Loss of All Meaning - Confirmed!
January 25th, 2008
The folks over at Brawl Central have a serious problem. It involves the use of the word ‘confirm’ to authenticate new info about Brawl. Take this for example:
As said in a previous update, we wouldn’t be reporting on any of the leak stories unless we had confirmation, but this seems like its real.
So in other words - you don’t.
So when it was ‘leaked’ that Zelda’s down-special move was named ‘Twilight Change,’ and mumbled something about the name ‘Sheik’ in parenthesis, they immediately made a news post reading:
Sheik Confirmed!
Well, guess what happened? Turned out there wasn’t even a down-special move listed. So they made an additional news post titled:
Sheik De-confirmed
Wait, ‘de-confirmed?’ Well great, now saying something is ‘confirmed’ is totally useless, as it can be just as quickly de-confirmed. But, oh, does this get better.
Again, we apologize for this one piece of info that was unconfirmed. Just rememebr that weve been 100% correct on everything else, so there’s no need to doubt any other pieces of our info.
So in other words, you’re not always 100% correct about everything. Got it.
And finally, they recently posted a news update:
New Stage Confirmed as Final Destination!
Some websites have called the new stage we seen “end point” (end= Final, point= Destination), so this must be confirming Final Destination as the stage, if we couldn’t already tell.
Hmm, “so this must be confirming…” sure sounds promising. Why not just say, “New Stage Appears to be Final Destination?” Well, when their source in Japan actually picked up the magazine with this possible info, they then wrote:
“Final Destination is now 100% completely confirmed.”
Woah, look out everybody! This stage isn’t just confirmed… it’s 100% completely confirmed! Heck, that’s even better than 100% confirmed!
I swear that site is run by a couple of middle-schoolers….
