Loss of All Meaning – Confirmed!

Ray The folks over at Brawl Central have a serious problem. It involves the use of the word ‘confirm’ to authenticate new info about Brawl. Take this for example:

As said in a previous update, we wouldn’t be reporting on any of the leak stories unless we had confirmation, but this seems like its real.

So in other words – you don’t.

So when it was ‘leaked’ that Zelda’s down-special move was named ‘Twilight Change,’ and mumbled something about the name ‘Sheik’ in parenthesis, they immediately made a news post reading:

Sheik Confirmed!

Well, guess what happened? Turned out there wasn’t even a down-special move listed. So they made an additional news post titled:

Sheik De-confirmed

Wait, ‘de-confirmed?’ Well great, now saying something is ‘confirmed’ is totally useless, as it can be just as quickly de-confirmed. But, oh, does this get better.

Again, we apologize for this one piece of info that was unconfirmed. Just rememebr that weve been 100% correct on everything else, so there’s no need to doubt any other pieces of our info.

So in other words, you’re not always 100% correct about everything. Got it.

And finally, they recently posted a news update:

New Stage Confirmed as Final Destination!
Some websites have called the new stage we seen “end point” (end= Final, point= Destination), so this must be confirming Final Destination as the stage, if we couldn’t already tell.

Hmm, “so this must be confirming…” sure sounds promising. Why not just say, “New Stage Appears to be Final Destination?” Well, when their source in Japan actually picked up the magazine with this possible info, they then wrote:

“Final Destination is now 100% completely confirmed.”

Woah, look out everybody! This stage isn’t just confirmed… it’s 100% completely confirmed! Heck, that’s even better than 100% confirmed!

I swear that site is run by a couple of middle-schoolers….

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9 Comments

  1. Dahcheet says:

    Wow, those guys are winnars….

    At least they’re only ruining their own credibility.

  2. hyper says:

    this game better be good! >:O

  3. Matthew says:

    Oh God, what f-ing amateurs. Not to even mention that Nintendo gave out so much info about the game… I’m just wondering how much people want to know before they play the God damn thing. I’m not going to lie, Nintendo’s updates killed my Brawl hype, but some people are praising it like the second coming of Jenna Jameson.

  4. Matthew is ghey says:

    “Final Destination is now 100% completely confirmed.”
    After reading that I just had to laugh my ass off! LOL!
    I guess stupidity does exist from birth on! 😉

  5. Ransom says:

    As though we doubted “Endpoint” in the first place. Where else are we fighting Master Hand? If it wasn’t in, how hard would it be to make a flat plane in Stage Creator?

    NOT NEWS.

  6. Andrew says:

    What do you think about the masterpieces feature on dojo today?

  7. Narnian says:

    Oh goodness. That’s beyond ridiculous, but I guess the Brawl public hadn’t suffered enough already due to the incessant delays. If this game doesn’t live up to the hype, we’ll never hear the end of it. I am now %100 completely totally tired of waiting.

  8. Tom says:

    zelda.html
    sheik.html

    The down special move is called Transform and Sheik will, indeed, be in Brawl.
    Just… “de-confirmed”…
    If it comes from Masahiro Sakurai’s official SSBB blog, isn’t that enough confirmation?

  9. Ray says:

    zelda.html
    sheik.html

    The down special move is called Transform and Sheik will, indeed, be in Brawl.
    Just… “de-confirmed”…
    If it comes from Masahiro Sakurai’s official SSBB blog, isn’t that enough confirmation?

    Oh, absolutely. The problem was this had not been announced on the SSBB blog yet. So when it turned out their translations were wrong, we realized they didn’t have any info about Sheik at all.

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